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After thorough self examination, I've decided that somewhere back in time there must've been a crab in my particular evolutionary chain of events. Seems that lately, I prefer to move sideways as opposed to straight ahead.

The last few days have been rainy, and the garage door has to stay down because of it because of all of the bare metal. When that door is down, I may as well not even bother to go down there. There is so much junk crammed into just about every inch, that there is absolutely no room to work. Nonetheless, I went down there Tuesday, and again on Wednesday and sat in the 18" between the tail of the car, and the garage door and attempted something. Needless to say, nothing happened. Actually, the only thing that did happen was I managed to absolutely trash two pairs of jeans after only about an hour each day as a result of sitting w/ my legs under the rear of the car and just getting covered in bondo dust.

Today, I decided that I wasn't gonna get covered in bondo dust. It was a nice day, the door was open and I could drag anything, and everything out of the garage to make room for whatever project I set my mind to.

I left it all right where it sat.

Instead, I grubbed around for the head lights, the bucket assemblies, and the turn signals. I decided that I would spend however much time as required to completely refurbish the stuff, and install my new Halogen headlights on the slim premise that I may get to see what the "Angel Eyes" halo that surrounds the main head light might look like illuminated.

Now,.......as you've just read that,.......How much time should I set aside to clean, sand, paint, and do whatever else is required to make a set of halogen replacement lights fit where the old sealed beams used to go?

A couple of hours?

A half day?

The whole day?

It's not done yet?





If you picked the last, you'd be right. First we gotta talk about the "issues"

In 1978 Fairmont had clear front turn signal lenses. Mine coincidentally are junk. One is cracked, and the other is broken. I say all this because I actually like the clear lenses, over all of the subsequent years that had amber pieces. While that really doesn't matter in the grand scheme of things, considering that mine are un-usable the fact of the matter is that clear lenses are easier to duplicate ( if that's what I can call it) than amber. Purely because polycarbonate (i.e. Lexan) comes in clear.

Nextly, the headlight assy's had probably never had an occasion to be removed since they were installed at the factory. Not only was there dirt and grime as a tell tale as proof of that, there was also that orange kinda junk that happens when somebody lives on a dirt road, and something never sees the business end of a soapy rag. Add to that that the car had been previously repainted, was poorly masked, and the resulting yellow overspray was all over the things as well.

Lastly, there is other broken junk. One mounting point for the outer trim ring is gone, and the three little cushions that each headlight bucket rides on have broken.

So,...there you have it. I was gonna do all this junk and get another "diversion" behind me so that there will be one less thing to have at the end of the road to worry about.

Undeterred,.....I started the process. ( I actually moved forward to do this).

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One housing cleaned, stripped of the old yeller paint, and resprayed. Notice the broke assed tab in the upper left corner. If you look to the center of the headlight area, you can see whats left of the factory supplied hard plastic bucket cusions.

And here's what I did to fix them.

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When I was looking for something to use as a substitute for the factory cushions, the problem was how to hold them in place. Originally, I was planning on on countersinking a screw into some small chinky-doo piece of plastic. Then I saw these things hangin' on the hook at AZ. I figured what the hell. Easy to mount, easy to replace, and adjustable if they turn out to be too shallow. I bought a box of 15 for the 12 pieces that needed fixin'

The next thing you have to do is enlarge the hole in the back of each bucket fro the grommet that is on the tail of the new headlight. That was straightforward enough. A red, right turning pair of tin snips, and a die grinder w/ a flap wheel to smooth the burrs made short work of that.

However, If you decide to do this, you'll find out that cutting the buckets isn't all you gotta cut.

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Again, if you have the right tools (in this case a die grinder w/ an aluminum cutting burr) clearancing that plastic that is hanging in the way takes less than a minute. Just know that you're gonna have to do it.

By mid day, I had to wait on paint to dry. I had already cleaned up the TS housings, and was trying to decide what to do about replacing the lens. Even though it isn't that thick, the old lens stands off the housing 1/2". Made sense to me to simply have a piece of lexan cut to fit the housing that was 1/2" thick. Granted, a little thick, but at this point, I'm not gonna try and glue acrylic together for the sake of keeping it similar to the factory lens.

I called the local plastics dude, asked if he could cut me a couple of small pieces while I waited, he said that he could, so I went on down.

And almost had a stroke when he charged me 33.00 for those two small pieces. I managed not to just the same.

When I got back, everything was still too tacky to handle, so, I went about modifying the TS housings to allow me to fit that thick assed piece of lexan on top.

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See the problem is that there are two stand offs at each end, and one big diivider thingy in the middle, Now grinding off the end pieces was no problem, but if I just did that to the center, I'd break through so I had to fill it before I could grind it.

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Filled from behind w/ standard body filler.

Then I ground on the thing. When I got it close I stopped and moved over to Mikes's bench sander.
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80 grit long board paper, stuck to the garage floor.

after about a minute of that, you get this.

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Painted, and shiny, w/ my still wrapped coke bottle lens on edge for effect.

By now it's late, but I'm able to finally put the headlights in the buckets, and screw the trim rings on.
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This is about as good as a set of fairmont lights are gonna get. You can see the blue reflection from the H4 bulbs behind the reflector. Not important today, but those blue bulbs will eventually hit the thrash can, in favor of a standard white light.

Now it's dark. I wire nut the wires together, and form a pigtail that'll allow me to wire up the angel eyes, and see what the're gonna look like. The pic in the Summit catalog showed light completely surrounding the perimeter.

I got something a little different...

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Again,.......the camera doesn't really tell the truth. Ther are 2 leds on op, and two on bottom. I guess the light is supposed to "beam" through the perimeter tube thingy ala fiber optics, but it don't exactly work that way.

Im ok with it, It's different.

And anybody who knows me, knows that that is what I'm all about.

What left is to decide what to do to the thick piece of lexan before I permanently glue that to the housing. I can sand the backside, or I bead blast it to "frost" it so it's no longer see through.

or I can leave it as is, and install amber led 1157's.

I can also find some window film, and apply it to the back side that would act as a diffuser. The stuff I'm finding isn't permanent though, and can be removed. I don't want this stuff coming off inside a glued together housing, so,....I'm kinda up in the air.
 
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Have you considered using a router to remove the excess material from the Lexan so that you have a perimeter just wide enough for your glue joint? That would mimic the original signal lenses more closely. After routing out the middle section, you could put colored plastic sheet in place of the routed out plastic to produce the desired color effect.
 
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Have you considered using a router to remove the excess material from the Lexan so that you have a perimeter just wide enough for your glue joint? That would mimic the original signal lenses more closely. After routing out the middle section, you could put colored plastic sheet in place of the routed out plastic to produce the desired color effect.
I have, but I'm concerned that I'll trash it. I may have to do some routing underside, I haven't stuck a bulb up in there to see how high it stands, ( may bump it's head against the lexan)
If I don't, I have my solution for diffusion w/o " clouding" the back side, or making the thing overly complicated to finish. I'll see in a couple of hours.
 
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I have, but I'm concerned that I'll trash it. I may have to do some routing underside, I haven't stuck a bulb up in there to see how high it stands, ( may bump it's head against the lexan)
If I don't, I have my solution for diffusion w/o " clouding" the back side, or making the thing overly complicated to finish. I'll see in a couple of hours.

Use the router as a table mounted device and use a guide strip to limit how much gets routed out

See table router with guide - YouTube for a how to build a router table if you don't already have one.
 
I have to have the MOST expensive front turn signal lenses on a Fairmont in the entire world.

I solved my dilemma regarding what/how to finish the lenses. It wasn't cheap.

Friday morning, I decided that I would simply take some of the perforated mesh that I'm using all over the car, and lay a piece of that as a barrier and spray black paint through it to create a dot pattern on the back of the lens. That way, the bulbs would not be see-able through the front, and light would certainly be able to get out from the back.

I did that.

But the end result sucked. W/o a way to hold the mesh tightly against the lens, the resulting dot pattern was not clean, and inconsistent. So I waited until it was dry, and sanded it back off (can't wipe lexan w/ lacquer thinner,......that would be a no-no.)

I figured I'd call the surrounding vinyl sign makers, and get a template made that I could stick on, then paint, then pull off, so that I'd have a clean edge and the consistency that I wanted.

7 phone calls later, I discovered that I wasn't gonna get that done today, and I wanted it done today.

On the 8th call I stumbled across a guy that does vehicle wraps. He asked me why I didn't just use their product that the put on glass when they wrap a car instead of buying something that ill end up pulling back off. He made sense to me that I was going about the whole thing the wrong way.

Okay I hear what you're saying, can you make me two small pieces that I can cover the back side of my turn signal lens with?

Yep.

Can you do it today?

Nope.

I can have it for you on Monday though.

I wanted it today.

So I called a few more vinyl wrap guys until I found a guy that could do it for me today w/o penalizing me w/ a "rush" charge.

We do have a minimum charge though......

How much?

50 bucks.

You're telling me that two pieces of this perforated vinyl cut 2-3/16" x 14" is gonna cost me 50 bucks?

Yep. We have to print it black. That stuff only comes in white, and when we have to load that stuff onto the printer I gotta make a minimum charge of 50 bucks.

*Sigh*

Ok, What the hell. In for a penny, in for a pound. That was the way I wanted to do the lenses, so do it.

I'll have em for you by end of day.

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This is exactly what I wanted. The perfs are so small that there are hundreds of them in that small space The bulbs are not in yet, and the light you see is through the socket. When there are bulbs in there, that black lens is gonna turn orange.

Now if I lived in an inspection state, that might not fly, but I don't, so I don't have to worry about getting dinked for having a non-sae certified lens material on my front turn signal.

But like I said, these things, as mundane as they are didn't come cheap. W/ the cost of the Lexan, and now the additional charge to wrap them, these turn signals are now worth 83.00 w/o bulbs and sockets. If I put led bulbs in there, that'll add another 40.00 to that total, and if I need sockets (haven't checked my old ones yet) that push it up even more.

"Oh look! here comes the guy w/ the $150.00 turn signal lenses on his Fairmont".

What's the difference really?......

That'll be the same guy that has the 500.00 roller cam,..... the $6000.00 6 banger,...the $300.00 valve cover,......the $600.00 tail lights........

Upon reflection,....150.00 turn signals are par for the course on this car.

Who likes them? Who don't?
 
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I'm sitting on the couch, beer on coaster enjoying 5 pages of Gila drama when I nearly spit out my beer to see Mike adopting a Japanese kid. I spit out my beer because I was that taken back.... I'm thinking to myself that this is such a selfless act and I can't wait to commend Mike for taking on such a daunting task as adopting a child. I read further to learn that it's a subwoofer......A SUBWOOFER!!!! Ok, now I'm thinking to myself that Mike is a jackass and the joke sure is on me. This is the last time I get sentimental over anything you say @madmike1157 Carry on with epic turn signal lenses because they are cool. I can't believe there are so many car audio guys here, not me I drive with the radio off more often than not.
 
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I'm sitting on the couch, beer on coaster enjoying 5 pages of Gila drama when I nearly spit out my beer to see Mike adopting a Japanese kid. I spit out my beer because I was that taken back.... I'm thinking to myself that this is such a selfless act and I can't wait to commend Mike for taking on such a daunting task as adopting a child. I read further to learn that it's a subwoofer......A SUBWOOFER!!!! Ok, now I'm thinking to myself that Mike is a jackass and the joke sure is on me. This is the last time I get sentimental over anything you say @madmike1157 Carry on with epic turn signal lenses because they are cool. I can't believe there are so many car audio guys here, not me I drive with the radio off more often than not.
Hey,....it's not just a subwoofer. It is a testament to the typical things you might see at an art gallery where people see weird s hit in the sculptures, and paintings that the "artist" was trying to convey in the crap that he has on display.

I looked at the box sitting behind the seat, and I saw a car seat stuffed full of new Japanese components. ( the kid)

Dont blame me because you lack the ability to see into the mind of genius.:rolleyes:

So then the tally for you getting your chain yanked is now 2-0.

Once when I sucked the cat into the radiators,
Twice when you expected an almost 60 year old curmudgeon who had every friend my teenage sons have ever had terrified of me, adopting a toddler from japan.

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Tonight you have an opportunity to be set for life.

Yes you read right, tonight I'm debuting the new online game show hosted by me. I'm calling the game "What The Hell Is That Thing?" The Game play is super easy.

You send me 5 bucks and you get to guess What The Hell Is That Thing. If You get it right, You Win.

Tonight's Grand Prize is an all expenses paid trip to Syria.

Yes, believe it! Beautiful war torn Syria! Be the first in your group of friends to experience first hand what it feels like to be held for ransom by some power hungry militant group trying to restore the country back to the way it was before...............electricity. Experience the butt clench as your Airbus 300 attempts to land on a runway now full of impact craters left as a result of direct hits from Russian supplied 105mm mortar rounds. Make the most of your stay there by trying to find running, clean water. Make it a daily adventure!! Bask in the knowledge that you will more than likely have to be smuggled out of the country in the back of a hay covered wagon pulled by donkeys, all while paying every last cent you own just to get out with your miserable life.

Cant wait to get started?!!!

Lets Play!!

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What The Hell Is That Thing?

To play, simply open a paypal account, and send 5.00 C/O me @ Whatwereyouthinking.com. Want to take more than one guess? Take advantage of our 2 for 10, 3 for 15 special. (hurry though, this is a limited offer) If you are the first to guess correctly, you will be notified by certified mail. (allow 6-8 weeks for delivery). In order to fly to a third world country, you must agree to a battery of invasive tests, including (but not limited to): Body cavity exams to root out possible implanted listening devices, Hepatitis A,B,C, DEFGHIJKLMNOP immunizations, Ebola, Cholera, Malaria, Diphtheria, Polio, Measles, Mumps, Chicken pox, rabies,(requires 14 shots to the abdominal cavity), and flu vaccines.
Your entry must be received by midnight of the day that the "What the Hell Is That Thing" was first displayed, but you must wait till the operators are standing by to receive your guesses. Operators will be standing by starting at 11:59:59.

Winners, and the answer will be announced the following day.
 
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I'll actually send you 5 bucks but I expect the trip, I plan on winning by default here as I'll be the only sucker to send you real dollars!
Not guessing, I have no Idea. Shall I send you a 5 spot in the US Mail or do you prefer a check ;)
 
I'll actually send you 5 bucks but I expect the trip, I plan on winning by default here as I'll be the only sucker to send you real dollars!
Not guessing, I have no Idea. Shall I send you a 5 spot in the US Mail or do you prefer a check ;)

* last nights game has ended. Please do not send any money as our operators are no longer standing by.
 
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