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Jack Bauer > Chuck Norris

  • Thread starter Thread starter Deleted member 87397
  • Start date Start date Jan 15, 2007
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Mustang5L5

That is…until I whipped out my Bissell
Mod Dude
Feb 18, 2001
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Jan 15, 2007
#21
  • Jan 15, 2007
  • #21
Jack Bauer is the man and anyone who doesn't agree with me is getting the bancake slapped on them
 
P

PJB

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#22
  • Jan 15, 2007
  • #22
double
 
P

PJB

New Member
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#23
  • Jan 15, 2007
  • #23
View attachment 410833 > all
 

85_SS_302_Coupe

it sucks (I know) to be on the receiving end
15 Year Member
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#24
  • Jan 15, 2007
  • #24
Ok you've obviously been duped by Keiffer Sutherland....because you think he is some sort of badass.....


He is an actor...nothing more. He was in Lost Boys and he got his ass kicked by some other actor dude who hasn't done a memorable movie since that one. KS reads scripts and acts....Chuck Norris owns that actor dork.
 

RsStanG1987

I shaved all my pubes playing this game.
10 Year Member
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#25
  • Jan 15, 2007
  • #25
The only man who can beat norris did this...
View attachment 410829
 

GT Drifter

New Member
Mar 26, 2003
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Jan 15, 2007
#26
  • Jan 15, 2007
  • #26
Chunk Norris isn't afaird of the dark, the dark is afaird of Chuck Norris.
 

90mustangGT

I felt sorry for girls because
Founding Member
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Jan 15, 2007
#27
  • Jan 15, 2007
  • #27
There are many myths about Chuck Norris, but all humor aside, the man is quite accomplished. Here is a real biography:


When you think of Chuck Norris, you either immediately think action movie star (recalling his numerous feature films) or television star, for his long-running CBS television series, "Walker, Texas Ranger."

But prior to that, Chuck was a martial arts star, winning many martial arts championships including being a six-time undefeated World Professional MiddleWeight Karate Champion. Chuck was also a renowned teacher in the martial arts. Some of his students were Steve McQueen, Bob Barker, Priscilla Presley and Donnie & Marie Osmond.

From 1964 to 1968, Chuck won many State, National, and International amateur karate titles. In 1968, Chuck fought and won the World Professional MiddleWeight Karate championships by defeating the World's Top Fighters. He held that title until 1974 when he retired undefeated.

In 1968, Chuck was inducted into the Black Belt Hall of Fame as Fighter of the Year. In 1975, he was inducted as Instructor of the Year and in 1977, Chuck received the honor of Man of the Year.

Chuck is also founder and President of United Fighting Arts Federation with over 2,300 black belts all over the world.

In 1997, Chuck achieved another milestone in his life by being the first man ever in the Western Hemisphere to be awarded an 8th degree Black Belt Grand Master recognition in the Tae Kwon Do system. This was a first in 4,500 years of tradition.

Chuck's intense drive and determination extended beyond his martial arts and acting career. He became an offshore powerboat racer with speeds of 140 miles per hour. In 1991, Chuck with his team and sponsor "Popeye Chicken" won the World Off Shore Powerboat championships. Then he went on to setting a new world record by racing a 38 foot Scarab boat 605 miles across the Great Lakes, from Chicago to Detroit, in 12 hours and 8 minutes.

In 1988, Chuck wrote his autobiography, "The Secret of Inner Strength", for Little Brown Publishing, which became a New York Times Best Seller. He followed up a few years later with a second book, "The Secret Power Within: Zen Solutions to Real Problems", also with Little Brown Publishing.

Chuck was asked how he would like to be remembered. Chuck's answer was as a Humanitarian. He has gotten a good start by:

1.) Being the spokesperson for United Way, doing an eight-minute commercial, which helped bring in over two billion dollars.

2.) Veterans Administration spokesperson visiting over 12 V.A. hospitals and speaking with World War II, Korean and Vietnam War Veterans including one from World War I.

3.) Winning the 1998 Epiphany award on Walker, Texas Ranger for the best Christian program.

4.) The Jewish Humanitarian Man of the Year Award.

5.) Actively involved with the Make A Wish Foundation for 20 years by making dreams come true for terminally ill children.

6.) BMI Music Television Award for Walker, Texas Ranger theme song, "Eyes of a Ranger".

7.) Texas Ranger Hall of Fame.

8.) Commissioned Police Officer for Terrell, Texas.

9.) Motivational speaker for many Christian ministries, such as T.D. Jakes Ministry, Trinity Broadcasting, and Bill Glass Crusade.

But Chuck thinks his most rewarding accomplishment was the creation of his Kick-Start Foundation. With the help of President George Bush, Chuck implemented a program teaching the martial arts to 150 high-risk children at M C Williams Middle School in Houston, Texas, as part of the school curriculum. The program was so successful in helping these kids raise their self-esteem and instilling discipline and respect, as well as getting them out of gangs, that the program is now in 30 schools with over 4,200 young boys and girls actively participating.
Click to expand...

http://www.chucknorris.com/html/biog.html


Those other guys are just actors.
 

90

Active Member
Sep 24, 2006
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Michigan insane asylum
Jan 15, 2007
#28
  • Jan 15, 2007
  • #28
~FrankenStang~ said:
^ Ok, I just fell in love with you.

There is no debate here.

Chuck Norris (manly) would kill KEIFFER SUTHERLAND (what kind of manly name is that??) with laser beams from his eyes and ass then piss acid on his corpse.
Click to expand...

frankie, i always knew you loved me!... im just stateing the facts here...
 

Darkwriter77

Resident Ranting Negative Nancy
5 Year Member
Jul 1, 2005
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Jan 16, 2007
#29
  • Jan 16, 2007
  • #29
Yes, but let's not forget ... Bruce Lee whooped Chuck Norris's arse in "Return of the Dragon." But then again, Bruce Lee was killed off by something as weird as an allergic reaction to some "herbal medicine" he took while visiting a chick he'd been banging on the side (his wife, Linda, probably had a hand in it). So, I guess then that means Chuck wins by default, or something.

Chuck Norris has muscles in his poop.
 

90mustangGT

I felt sorry for girls because
Founding Member
Jan 15, 2002
2,773
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89
Dallas, GA
Jan 16, 2007
#30
  • Jan 16, 2007
  • #30
Chuck Norris for Pres in '08! Or at least our lead diplomat. See, one thing would be backwards.... we send the "diplomat" when negotiations with the US military fail. I bet Kim ill Jun and Armagagaidlfksdfkjsd (whatever the pres of Iran's name is) would change their tune after a roundhouse kick from Chuck. Then a nuclear bomb just wouldn't see so bad ass!

I'm kidding of course.
 

90mustangGT

I felt sorry for girls because
Founding Member
Jan 15, 2002
2,773
17
89
Dallas, GA
Jan 16, 2007
#31
  • Jan 16, 2007
  • #31
Darkwriter77 said:
Yes, but let's not forget ... Bruce Lee whooped Chuck Norris's arse in "Return of the Dragon." But then again, Bruce Lee was killed off by something as weird as an allergic reaction to some "herbal medicine" he took while visiting a chick he'd been banging on the side (his wife, Linda, probably had a hand in it). So, I guess then that means Chuck wins by default, or something.
Click to expand...


What happened there was Chuck's kicks were so powerfull, it took a while for Burce to figure out he was dead... kind of like heavy drug and alchohol abuse when your young taking it's tole when you get older. So, if you ever get kicked by Chuck and live afterwards, count your days because that didn't mean it wasn't fatal.
 

1990Coupe

Founding Member
Mar 11, 2002
1,462
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Toms River NJ
Jan 16, 2007
#32
  • Jan 16, 2007
  • #32
Darkwriter77 said:
Yes, but let's not forget ... Bruce Lee whooped Chuck Norris's arse in "Return of the Dragon." But then again, Bruce Lee was killed off by something as weird as an allergic reaction to some "herbal medicine" he took while visiting a chick he'd been banging on the side (his wife, Linda, probably had a hand in it). So, I guess then that means Chuck wins by default, or something.

Chuck Norris has muscles in his poop.[/QUOTE]




chuck norris can make a woman climax simply by pointing at her and saying "Boo Ya"
Click to expand...
 

1990Coupe

Founding Member
Mar 11, 2002
1,462
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Toms River NJ
Jan 16, 2007
#33
  • Jan 16, 2007
  • #33
90mustangGT said:
What happened there was Chuck's kicks were so powerfull, it took a while for Burce to figure out he was dead... kind of like heavy drug and alchohol abuse when your young taking it's tole when you get older. So, if you ever get kicked by Chuck and live afterwards, count your days because that didn't mean it wasn't fatal.
Click to expand...

 

85_SS_302_Coupe

it sucks (I know) to be on the receiving end
15 Year Member
Nov 11, 2003
6,945
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#34
  • Jan 16, 2007
  • #34
Bruce Lee ended his own life because he was bored with being the most dangerous mortal in existence. When he beat Chuck, he said to himself "damn...i just beat Chuck...there is nothing left for me to do but die" and so he did. From that day forth, Chuck has reigned supreme.
 

Flavadave4

Active Member
Nov 28, 2003
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Jan 16, 2007
#35
  • Jan 16, 2007
  • #35
I'm a hulkamaniac
 

1990Coupe

Founding Member
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Toms River NJ
Jan 16, 2007
#36
  • Jan 16, 2007
  • #36
Flavadave4 said:
I'm a hulkamaniac
Click to expand...

60 somthing years old and still JACKED as sheet
 

Strype

Cuthbert catcher
Founding Member
May 11, 1999
61
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104
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Jan 16, 2007
#37
  • Jan 16, 2007
  • #37
Jet Li > Chucky
 

Flavadave4

Active Member
Nov 28, 2003
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Utica, NY
Jan 16, 2007
#38
  • Jan 16, 2007
  • #38
1990Coupe said:
60 somthing years old and still JACKED as sheet
Click to expand...

I hear ya bro
 

85_SS_302_Coupe

it sucks (I know) to be on the receiving end
15 Year Member
Nov 11, 2003
6,945
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223
Northern KY
Jan 16, 2007
#39
  • Jan 16, 2007
  • #39
The Hulkster is a product of science....


Steroids take Chuck Norrus when they wanna bulk up.
 

Strype

Cuthbert catcher
Founding Member
May 11, 1999
61
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104
Huntsvegas, AL
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#40
  • Jan 16, 2007
  • #40
Chuck Norris drives an ice cream truck covered in human skulls.
 
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