tie rods safe?

IMHO, ANY play is too much. you will be surprised if you remove your old one and play with it. it will swivel around in its socket real easily and be sloppy/chunky probably, whereas you will have trouble even swiveling the new one around. it will be real nice and tight.

they are so cheap compared to what damage can occur from not replacing one, i dont allow any tolerance.

others might feel different. good luck.