Guy's Code of Ethics
- Thread starter Daggar
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I think if a guy tells the wife that nos will help his over heating problem and will fix the a/c in the stang then said friend should agree till death..
kpack5982
Yeah, it was pretty stiff, but eventually a buddy
Hoodstrype, I like your pooping ideas. Anyways we used to have a bunch of rules we made up relating to such ideas in college and one was:
Thou shalt not "upper-decker" in any place of party, unless the party is so dubbed a keggar, or is the home to no one that your friends or group of your own partakers of the party do not know, or do not particularly care for. In case of "upper-decker", be sure to urinate over entire bathroom and employ other possible deceptive methods to conceal evidence of poop from being found in the back of the toilet.
Another one:
If an acquantence wakes up from a "passed out" position and does something unruly, such as peeing in a nearby hamper, throwing up on the floor, or some other volatile act involving nudity, do not react. Simply pull out the video camera or digital camera and try to catch guilty party in said act, or if unable, use story as a bargaining chip for the rest of their life.
Thou shalt not "upper-decker" in any place of party, unless the party is so dubbed a keggar, or is the home to no one that your friends or group of your own partakers of the party do not know, or do not particularly care for. In case of "upper-decker", be sure to urinate over entire bathroom and employ other possible deceptive methods to conceal evidence of poop from being found in the back of the toilet.
Another one:
If an acquantence wakes up from a "passed out" position and does something unruly, such as peeing in a nearby hamper, throwing up on the floor, or some other volatile act involving nudity, do not react. Simply pull out the video camera or digital camera and try to catch guilty party in said act, or if unable, use story as a bargaining chip for the rest of their life.
its what our country was founded on
ARE YOU GUYS ****ING KIDDING ME!!!!
PRIORITY NUMERO UNO: THOUGH SHALL NOT SPILL A BEER, EVER. IN THE EVENT THAT THIS OCCURS IT IS YOURS AND ONLY YOUR RESPONSIBLILTY TO REPLACE THE BEER(s) IMMEDIATLY.
Priorirty number 2: Never leave an unfinished beer...under ANY circumstances!
O yeah... and 3: vegetarians are ****ing gay
PRIORITY NUMERO UNO: THOUGH SHALL NOT SPILL A BEER, EVER. IN THE EVENT THAT THIS OCCURS IT IS YOURS AND ONLY YOUR RESPONSIBLILTY TO REPLACE THE BEER(s) IMMEDIATLY.
Priorirty number 2: Never leave an unfinished beer...under ANY circumstances!
O yeah... and 3: vegetarians are ****ing gay
lol i found this http://funny2.com/mensrules.htm
and one more i missed for you big guys... I am in shape, round is a shape
ahah this is good too http://www.jimgeary.com/faves/joxe/JOXMNW06.HTM
Don't rub the lamp if you don't want the genie to come out.
and one more i missed for you big guys... I am in shape, round is a shape
ahah this is good too http://www.jimgeary.com/faves/joxe/JOXMNW06.HTM
Don't rub the lamp if you don't want the genie to come out.
dvs bullet
New Member
>"BALLS" is coming home late after a night out with the guys smelling of
>perfume and beer, lipstick on your collar, slapping your wife on the ass
>and having the balls to say, "You're next!"
I came home from the strippers and the girl was pissed about it, I asked if we could skip to the make up sex while I was still horny. Does this count?
>perfume and beer, lipstick on your collar, slapping your wife on the ass
>and having the balls to say, "You're next!"
I came home from the strippers and the girl was pissed about it, I asked if we could skip to the make up sex while I was still horny. Does this count?
kpack5982
Yeah, it was pretty stiff, but eventually a buddy
That's hilarious!!! My ex went to the strip club with me once and I asked her to strip for me afterwards. She said that she didn't want to be lowered to the strippers' level. I grabbed her ass when she was walking away, kinda playing around. She turned around and just looked at me. My brilliant reply was "Come on, the strippers didn't mind". Needless to say, I never drank around her again.
dvs bullet
New Member
Lyncher said:
that was actually the closest she's come to hitting me! I then spent the next four hours listening to her go on
Been a while. And we have new members. I have noticed a lot of these rules being broken... Also, MAKE NOTE OF #2!!!
Anymore???
******************************************
Official StangNet
Guy Code of Ethics
#1: If your friend turns rice, it is YOUR responsibility to put his new ride out of its misery.
#2: You can NOT make note of a hot chick, milf, or sister without providing visual aid!
Update: All said girls will be compared to mob's girl
#3: You may NOT date your best friend's x-girl friend or sister without first getting permission from said friend.
#4: You MUST grant permission to your friend to date, your ex-girl friend if asked but you are not however, obligated to grant those same permissions in regards to your sister or other family members.
#5: *&^%$#@! must only be performed behind locked doors!
#6: Always keep a minimum distance of one urinal between you and anyone else. Never under any circumstances do you ever use a urinal right next to somebody. Either hold it or use a stall. And never check any other mans junk!
#7: When work sends you home early due to power loss or natural gas smell, do not notify the wife / girlfriend of your free time for the day. Spend that time on the couch or working on the car.
Note: If said significant other questions about you being home "early" tell her you just got home a little early
#8: Some things are best left alone. When anonymous calls are placed to the wife about suspicion of "extra marital affairs" do NOT run to the HR department demanding to know how your number fell into co-workers hands. HR will discover the TRUTH in the matter and you will be terminated and sleeping in your car until the divorce is final.
#9: Never let your neighbor borrow your tools. These tools are now his property and you will never see them again
#10: Never tell the wife / girl friend that you are searching for your x-girlfriends on myspace to see what they look like today. (the girls always take this the wrong way - no offense)
#11: Always offer the last beer to the guy that brought them to the party
#12: If you hang out with said wife/girlfriend too much and have your head up her butt 24/7 you will be told to hand over your "dude card"
#13: Absolutely no pink shirts! I don't care what you saw on the Old Navy commercial! (Never admit you have one on stangnet like lxwants12s or bcd )
#14: To get out of laundry duty. Dry her favorite shirt so that it shrinks so it is not wearable. Be careful though, because you might have to take her shopping to replace said shirt... try to avoid shopping duty at all costs!
#15: Just because something isn't broke doesn't mean it doesn't need to be fixed.
#16: Hitting someone in the groin is funny no matter what occasion it is!
#17: Don’t tell her more then once a day that you love her or else every time you hang up the phone and don’t say "I love you too" she will get suspicious.
#18: In no way ever do you say to your woman "wow, your friend ________ looks really good now that she lost some weight" and then forget to say this afterwards "but she still doesn't look as good as you"
…unless of course you like doing a lot of rule #5.
#19: ALWAYS FOR AS LONG AS YOU LIVE ATTEMPT TO PIITB!
#20: Thou shalt not "upper-decker" in any place of party, unless the party is so dubbed a keggar, or is the home to no one that your friends or group of your own partakers of the party do not know, or do not particularly care for. In case of "upper-decker", be sure to urinate over entire bathroom and employ other possible deceptive methods to conceal evidence of poop from being found in the back of the toilet.
#21: If an acquaintance wakes up from a "passed out" position and does something unruly, such as peeing in a nearby hamper, throwing up on the floor, or some other volatile act involving nudity, do not react. Simply pull out the video camera or digital camera and try to catch guilty party in said act, or if unable, use story as a bargaining chip for the rest of their life.
#22: THOU SHALL NOT SPILL A BEER, EVER. IN THE EVENT THAT THIS OCCURS IT IS YOURS AND ONLY YOUR RESPONSIBLILTY TO REPLACE THE BEER(s) IMMEDIATLY.
#23: Never leave an unfinished beer...under ANY circumstances!
#24: "BALLS" is coming home late after a night out with the guys smelling of
perfume and beer, lipstick on your collar, slapping your wife on the rear
and having the balls to say, "You're next!"
#25: It is always gay to hug other guy except for two exceptions:
1. Your team just won the game
2. His dog/wife/gf/kid just died (in that order) for any other deaths a simple condolence and an offer to go out for drinks is all that is necessary.
#26: Thou shalt not buy a car in the colors of brown, pink, lime green,
or sky blue.
Anymore???
******************************************
Official StangNet
Guy Code of Ethics
#1: If your friend turns rice, it is YOUR responsibility to put his new ride out of its misery.
#2: You can NOT make note of a hot chick, milf, or sister without providing visual aid!
Update: All said girls will be compared to mob's girl
#3: You may NOT date your best friend's x-girl friend or sister without first getting permission from said friend.
#4: You MUST grant permission to your friend to date, your ex-girl friend if asked but you are not however, obligated to grant those same permissions in regards to your sister or other family members.
#5: *&^%$#@! must only be performed behind locked doors!
#6: Always keep a minimum distance of one urinal between you and anyone else. Never under any circumstances do you ever use a urinal right next to somebody. Either hold it or use a stall. And never check any other mans junk!
#7: When work sends you home early due to power loss or natural gas smell, do not notify the wife / girlfriend of your free time for the day. Spend that time on the couch or working on the car.
Note: If said significant other questions about you being home "early" tell her you just got home a little early
#8: Some things are best left alone. When anonymous calls are placed to the wife about suspicion of "extra marital affairs" do NOT run to the HR department demanding to know how your number fell into co-workers hands. HR will discover the TRUTH in the matter and you will be terminated and sleeping in your car until the divorce is final.
#9: Never let your neighbor borrow your tools. These tools are now his property and you will never see them again
#10: Never tell the wife / girl friend that you are searching for your x-girlfriends on myspace to see what they look like today. (the girls always take this the wrong way - no offense)
#11: Always offer the last beer to the guy that brought them to the party
#12: If you hang out with said wife/girlfriend too much and have your head up her butt 24/7 you will be told to hand over your "dude card"
#13: Absolutely no pink shirts! I don't care what you saw on the Old Navy commercial! (Never admit you have one on stangnet like lxwants12s or bcd )
#14: To get out of laundry duty. Dry her favorite shirt so that it shrinks so it is not wearable. Be careful though, because you might have to take her shopping to replace said shirt... try to avoid shopping duty at all costs!
#15: Just because something isn't broke doesn't mean it doesn't need to be fixed.
#16: Hitting someone in the groin is funny no matter what occasion it is!
#17: Don’t tell her more then once a day that you love her or else every time you hang up the phone and don’t say "I love you too" she will get suspicious.
#18: In no way ever do you say to your woman "wow, your friend ________ looks really good now that she lost some weight" and then forget to say this afterwards "but she still doesn't look as good as you"
…unless of course you like doing a lot of rule #5.
#19: ALWAYS FOR AS LONG AS YOU LIVE ATTEMPT TO PIITB!
#20: Thou shalt not "upper-decker" in any place of party, unless the party is so dubbed a keggar, or is the home to no one that your friends or group of your own partakers of the party do not know, or do not particularly care for. In case of "upper-decker", be sure to urinate over entire bathroom and employ other possible deceptive methods to conceal evidence of poop from being found in the back of the toilet.
#21: If an acquaintance wakes up from a "passed out" position and does something unruly, such as peeing in a nearby hamper, throwing up on the floor, or some other volatile act involving nudity, do not react. Simply pull out the video camera or digital camera and try to catch guilty party in said act, or if unable, use story as a bargaining chip for the rest of their life.
#22: THOU SHALL NOT SPILL A BEER, EVER. IN THE EVENT THAT THIS OCCURS IT IS YOURS AND ONLY YOUR RESPONSIBLILTY TO REPLACE THE BEER(s) IMMEDIATLY.
#23: Never leave an unfinished beer...under ANY circumstances!
#24: "BALLS" is coming home late after a night out with the guys smelling of
perfume and beer, lipstick on your collar, slapping your wife on the rear
and having the balls to say, "You're next!"
#25: It is always gay to hug other guy except for two exceptions:
1. Your team just won the game
2. His dog/wife/gf/kid just died (in that order) for any other deaths a simple condolence and an offer to go out for drinks is all that is necessary.
#26: Thou shalt not buy a car in the colors of brown, pink, lime green,
or sky blue.
