Girl Help :(

DFG 5OH · Nov 21, 2005

well...as some of you know me and my girlfriend of 1+ years broke up about a month or 2 ago. Since then i've dated a few girls, mostly casual, kissed some, but nothing more than that. I didnt talk to my ex at all, up until recently, and now that we're back on speaking terms, i'm starting to want her back. We did not have a nasty break up...it just kinda ended.

So here's the thing, when i go out with other girls, i just doesnt mean anything...although i realize that with my ex...my feelings for her at strictly out of habit and i could easily get back into the "habit" of caring about another person, its just hard to ignore the feelings we shared for each other, and go on like it never happened. So i'm a senior in high school, just turned 18...and i realize that i probably should just be having fun, and hanging out, like i'm doing, because if i was going back out with my ex, then i couldnt be doing some of the things i'm doing now. I just miss her, and i dont know what to do...any advice could help

Caldwell · Nov 21, 2005

I think you should stop worrying so much about others and start taking care of #1.

Do yourself a favour.
Next year, so just over a month away... declare 2006 YOUR year.

Forget them. You'll have plenty of time to do whatever you want with women, for the rest of your life. Take this time now being single and rejoice in the fact that you can earn every single penny and spend it with whatever you want.

Enjoy that now while you can.

Start spoiling yourself for a change. Who gives a **** about women, they're not going anywhere.
*ahem*
sorry, I didn't mean that to sound as hostile as it might have appeared to be.
I really do love women.
But... someone has to look out for #1 dude, and no one else is going to do it for you.

timeless2 · Nov 21, 2005

You're still feeling attached. Don't sweat it, man. You're only 18 and there is a lot to experience for you yet--too young to be hooked on one person. Not that monogamy is bad (I'm married); it's just you need to sample different personalities before you can know what you do and don't like in a relationship before you decide to execute on a long term plan.
Hope that helps. Time will tell....

DFG 5OH · Nov 21, 2005

oh i'm not wanting to have a long term relationship with her...i'm going to college soon and stuff...i'd just still like to be with her ya know?

timeless2 · Nov 21, 2005

matthiasj said:
oh i'm not wanting to have a long term relationship with her...i'm going to college soon and stuff...i'd just still like to be with her ya know?

Yeah, a consistent companion, and an established rapport with the opposite sex is a good thing. The intimate relations aren't a bad thing, either.

Blackened302 · Nov 21, 2005

just do what's gonna make you happy TODAY. who knows, your car might blow up next time you start a 2nd gear burnout, burning you along with it. think of it that way.

Nik_95Cobra · Nov 21, 2005

F Em'. If ya'll broke up once she's obviously not worth a lifetime of effort so keep looking. 1st time's her fault, 2nd time's your fault.

Joes95GT · Nov 21, 2005

I'm kind of the odd example of having a girlfriend for an extended period of time. We've been dating for 4+ years (ever since I was 16) and while I see my friends get tangled up in girlfriend bull**** drama, I've never had to worry about that. Me and my girl live a few doors away from eachother (each of us live in separate houses on my college's campus) and we hang out or spend the night over eachothers place probably 3 nights a week (and they are usually weekends). The others we don't see eachother and half the time only talk for AT MOST 15 minutes.

What I'm trying to say to you is this....

For one, you don't want to waste your life away on a girlfriend. I love my girlfriend to death, but we each understand that spending every last second with eachother is a load of ****.

Having been through what you are looking for, I can tell you the only way to do it is to have a 'non-possessive' girlfriend that can relax and not be up eachother's asses all the time. The thing I see happening all the time is couples breaking up because they don't know how to get off of eachothers balls and spend some time away from eachother. When you spend a lot of time together, the bickering and bitching begins.

And, you're at the position in your life where college is beginning. If you get some chick that's going to be moving away, stuff won't last. And if it does, is it really worth keeping up if you never get to see eachother? It wouldn't to me...

If I were in your shoes, I'd be waiting till after highschool or college (if you're going) to find some chicks.

EDIT: I rambled a lot. Just read the important parts.

Joe

DFG 5OH · Nov 21, 2005

yea...i might chill with her sometime, but i dont see us getting back together. thankz joe!

Kevin R. · Nov 21, 2005

Joe, you hit the nail on the head.

With my last girlfriend I spent almost all my free time with her, and although my friends were still there, I missed out on a lot (or they did, I BRING DA PARTY!) After we broke up and the initial "I miss her." "Wow, I have a lot of free time." hit, I realized how much fun just hanging with the guys, meeting new chics, workin' on cars, etc. I had been missing.

Wait until the girl comes along that lets you do all of these things and understands you NEED to do them to keep grounded.

I say it's in the past. You're 18. Keep single buddy, it's well worth it.

DFG 5OH · Nov 21, 2005

yea, i love workin on cars with my friends, having free time, workin out...ect...

xr8d302 · Nov 21, 2005

Matt....I'll try to say this with as much heart and conviction as I had when I first said hello to my first legitamate children.

You need to bang a few hookers. Seriously, I hear they can be pretty cheap down around the states. It's a quick and easy lay that can easily wear down, if not cut, any strings you have still attached to the ex, all for less than a day's wages. Plus, these women will take it in the pooper and not bring it up the next morning, cause dammit, you'll kick'em out before then. With hookers also comes a great pride in knowing that you are, in fact, better than the one you're with...a real confidence boost, and that's what you need to show you that you can live without her. So bang that hourly rate chick with the emotion of a freight train, then kick her off at the next stop, so to speak.

We believe in you here at Stangnet, now go throw it to a dirty prostitute for us...

Make us proud....

Nik_95Cobra · Nov 21, 2005

"Taiwan Massage" Down the street from me offers happy endings, give em a shot.

xr8d302 · Nov 21, 2005

@ "give'em a shot"

94gts · Nov 21, 2005

well lets see.....

Im 18 right now, and just graduated high school in june. I took a year off going directly into college but will go in the fall of 2006.

i had some real ****ty experiences with girls my junior and senior year of high school. i was cheated on junior year, then stopped bothering with girls for a while because of that. Then, when i got back into them, i got screwed over 3 times in a row. But in taking this year off, so far i have had more "fun" than i ever did in all of high school. I learned that the key is too not think. At this point of our lives matt, we should be having fun. If it makes us think too hard or stresses us out, then forget it and move on like i had to do. Like the others said, there is plenty more out there

Guero · Nov 21, 2005

just spoil yourself like i am. I buy whatever i want, whenever i want, and no one tells me *****. I still get laid. women come and go but you only stay young once.

DFG 5OH · Nov 21, 2005

you guys are definatly right, its just hard to let her go, and move on, without someone to move on to...i live in a small town so choices are limited

95WhiteVenom · Nov 21, 2005

Well Matt as i've told you before i've had some crazy girls im my life. Everyting from geeks for freaks! I'd give you this info. hang out with her see where it goes don't push anything. You never know could end up growing even closer to one another. If not then ohh well she's still a friend she can help you get other girls.
As far as the college thing goes don't worry about getting attached to someone before leaving for college.
As i've told ya man my GF is over 2 and a half hours away and i get to see her two days a week if im lucky. Our relationship works out great.

BTW: Here's an old fashoing 22 year old for ya,..
I asked my GF's dad and mom if I had their belssing to marry their daughter. Had to get the OK before I spent all the cash on a ring.

xkuntrycowboyx · Nov 22, 2005

Dude,... i know from experience... if you keep trying to FIND someone ur gonna waste time.. and ur whole senior year. it sounds hard but don't worry about havin a girl.... date some maybe but just make alot of friends and have fun. You'll deff find a good chick in college, more likely than not you'll find ea. other, cuz u know NO ONE and you'll find someone thru experiences in college of commmon intrest.. it will be best for ya.

having to worry about a relationship is only going to frustrate, piss off, annoy, and beat you down. there will be good and bad, but then she'll b part of ur decision on college, DON'T LET THAT HAPPEN!

well, i feel ya brother, but u need to GET OVER HER those feelings look past it and just be friends with the girl.
sum it up... MAKE FRIENDS, DATE NOW, HANG OUT....... IN COLLEGE LET SOMEONE FIND YOU.... kbye

xkuntrycowboyx · Nov 22, 2005

...accidentaly doubled posted and erased so pass by this one!

Girl Help :(

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