Funny work stories in here! (i know, but it's time for another one)

[carbed87]

Im sorry if your getting tired of these threads, but they always turn out having a lot of funny **** in them, so let's hear it, doesn't matter if it has to do with a co-worker or customer or anything, as long as it's funny. I'll go first.

So i think i've said this like a bajillion times, but for those who dont know i re-image gas stations right now, which means we convert stations like BP, Giant, Mustang, Phillips 66, 76...etc to the new red white and silver conoco ****. anyways, just the other day im at a giant in flagstaff painting a colum under the canopy, so im up in the air like 10 feet PAINTING, and some guy rolls up and asks, "are the gas pumps working?" so of course i tell him they're fine, no big deal, well this must have happened at least two more times, so by the time the last guy came around and asked if the gas was working, i put my paint brush down and told him "no, we're fixing them right now, sorry" lol i know, not that funny, but you'd think that people would know the difference between painting and fixing things. anyways, your turn!

 

[90]

ok i got a good one, one time we were wireing a house, it had to be done that day.. start to finish on a rough... so were almost done and we all go into the basement, and it me my boss and my buddy.. my boss is my buddys uncle... so we pounded this thing out and theres only about an hour left of work so my buddys hanging the panel my boss is doing the out side service, and im temp-ing the sump and the furness.... well the sump is right next to where the panel is... and my buddy steps off the ladder and right into the sump... mind you that this is where everyone piss'es and it smells horrible and lit looks nasty and he's knee deep in it... by this time im on the ground die-ing in laughter... and he screamen so pist off and my boss comes down, and joins in the laughing with me.. it was in the summer too and its all hot out side and stinky... do the whole way home we all kinda had to suffer that mess.... lol it was just a funny day!

 

[stprorolla49]

haha ill play...i work for a valet parking company, and i work with a buncha guys who probably haven't been thru college, aren't very smart, are kinda obnnoxious, and blind when it comes to girls....so im about to go park this womans car (probably around 30, and im 18), and the guy im workin with is like dude, shes hot as hell, you needa hit that ****...meanwhile, she is unbelivably ugly, and he is DEAD serious cause hes hitting on the ugliest chicks!! i mean i could give you like 25 reasons why i wouldnt go near that ****...so i was like dude, are you kidding? hes like yea man what are you gay or somethin? i was like are you kidding, do you have eyes?! and he was like damn man...so finally i just lied to him, and i was like dude, ive got a gf already, so im not messing with that ****, cause this went on all night....and when i told him that, he was like so what?! and one of the other guys chimes in and goes, "yea i cheat on my wife all the time...i ****ed some girl last nite!" i was like damn, do these guys have morals at all....

 

[carbed87]

haha ill play...i work for a valet parking company, and i work with a buncha guys who probably haven't been thru college, aren't very smart, are kinda obnnoxious, and blind when it comes to girls....so im about to go park this womans car (probably around 30, and im 18), and the guy im workin with is like dude, shes hot as hell, you needa hit that ****...meanwhile, she is unbelivably ugly, and he is DEAD serious cause hes hitting on the ugliest chicks!! i mean i could give you like 25 reasons why i wouldnt go near that ****...so i was like dude, are you kidding? hes like yea man what are you gay or somethin? i was like are you kidding, do you have eyes?! and he was like damn man...so finally i just lied to him, and i was like dude, ive got a gf already, so im not messing with that ****, cause this went on all night....and when i told him that, he was like so what?! and one of the other guys chimes in and goes, "yea i cheat on my wife all the time...i ****ed some girl last nite!" i was like damn, do these guys have morals at all....

i know exactly what you mean. all my co-workers are somehow convinced that i dont like girls and all i think about is mustangs just because my jaw doesn't hit the ground everytime i see a woman under 200lbs. lol, it pisses me off, but at the same time, they're all like 35-47 years old, so i understand that they take what they can get.

 

[bubba-dough]

Just last week I had new meats put all the way around because drag radials and maypops aren't for winter weather. I got the new Falken ZE 329's. So for starters this old guy coudn't get my door open, don't ask, I have no clue why. I see him opening it up from the inside. I go and address the problem there. Then I handed the key to the wheels and said I want to keep the back tires. He goes why, they are bald . Hahaha I said come on pal, are you kidding me. He said no. They are worn out. So I had to explain what a drag radial was. Then the other guy started bad mouthin the tires I bought. He said they were a "Big Lots" tire (meaning pure junk). So I asked how it is you can work at a tire place and not know what a drag radial is then I proceeded to tell them to look at the tires they took off the front (yes Falkens) and then talk crap about the tires I bought. When I turned around the manager was standing there apparently listening the whole time. When I went in to settle the bill the manager said he needed to have a talk with his guys. I told him not to worry about it for me.

 

[bubba-dough]

i know exactly what you mean. all my co-workers are somehow convinced that i dont like girls and all i think about is mustangs just because my jaw doesn't hit the ground everytime i see a woman under 200lbs. lol, it pisses me off, but at the same time, they're all like 35-47 years old, so i understand that they take what they can get.

I am almost in that age group and I will tell you that your standards do drop....considerably

 

[blackened88lx]

I work at a Harley-Davidson dealership, and we once told a new kid that one of the techs got fired, and was coming to pick up his tools, but the company owned the tool box. So we made the kid take every single tool out of this guys massive snap-on tool box and organize them on the bench, then bring the toolbox into the basement. The guy came into work the next day with tools everywhere and no tool box. He wasn't very happy.

 

[carbed87]

got another one, lol we were installing some canopy lights and the electrician that was wiring them up for us was new. So once he got on top of the gas station canopy he was all like "is it safe to walk on the white stuff up here" (the aluminum canopy deck) so i decided to really screw with him and say "uh... no man, you can only stand on the red beams" lol the look on his face when i said that was priceless. i waited like half an hour before i actually told him he could lol.

 

[89302guthrie]

my father works at a city bus station as a mechanic. and the place is huge, so they've got golf carts to go all over the place. there was a new mechanic who always made stupid mistakes, so when he did something they would do something to humiliate him. he screwed up big onetime, so they grabbed him, duct taped his mouth and arms and feet. taped him into the go cart, turned the steering wheel to the left, and then put a cinder block on the gas pedal. he did donuts int he garage for the whole lunch hour.

 

[RsStanG1987]

I worked at a nursing home a while back. We had this lady who worked with us who acted slow but we were sure it was an act. I made this lady so mad one time she went into the walkin cooler then the freezer behind it and started cursing at the top of her lungs because i made her so mad.

 

[mob]

hahaha man everyday at work is a funny story for me, i have too many.

heres one day haha.

 

[carbed87]

mob, maybe you should spend your spare time at work making more breadsticks. seing as how everytime at fazzoli's they're always slow to bring them cause they're running behind. and yes thats right, im holding you responsable for all the fazzoli chains in america

 

[MrStang123]

One day this kid comes up to us and asks to use the bathroom which is for employees only. So when we said no he proceeded to wet his pants and continue to shop.

Then one day this Indian dude was being a prick. So he was leaving the store and says to us in his Indian accent "You're stoopid!" and my friend replies very calmly, "you're stupid", and the guy screams at the top of his lungs "**** YOU MUDDA****A!" and my friend runs out of the store after him and the guy ran away.

When people piss us off we usually teabag their merchandise in the back before we sell it to them. The Xbox 360 kiosk has had balls rubbed all over it with ball hairs left on it by certain employees. We gotta remember not to touch them though.

Its always a good time at work!

 

[91ghp5.0]

Work for me, isn't so fun. I work in a bakery in an "upscale" supermarket my best friend's father owns. The old ladies are mean, the customers bitch, and the hours are long.

But oooooh the fun I have with my friend in the back talking crap about the other employees where no one can hear us.

The meat department guy gets extra cuts sometimes, and he cooks us all lunch in our ovens, but ssssshhh the boss doesn't know that. I'll think of a funny story tomorrow at work.