Rubber mallet or deadblow is a good method, just be gentle, you're just trying to coax it gently over the lip. as you do, the pads will start to compress the cylinder, and eventually you'll be able to work it off.
I would suggest installing one of your caliper mounting bolts, and then tapping to rotate the caliper off the rotor, pivoting on the pin you just installed. That way you don't risk knocking it completely off and potentially tweaking the hose. If I'm just doing a pad replacement, I try to only take one pin out and rotate the caliper off. Lots of high-end kits are specifically designed to work that way. If you've got a significant lip on your rotors, you might think about going ahead and replacing them, though.
Brakes are serious, but they're not rocket science. Make sure you have a Chilton's manual or other reference, and take your time. FWIW, the guys doing brakes at a lot of the commercial shops aren't the sharpest pencils in the can. If you take your time and do it right, you WILL do a better job than you will get in a shop. Best tool to have in your kit s good brake part grease--clean and lube your pins/mounting bolts, and all the places where your pads slide on the calipers. Biggest thing I've seen to cause modern disk brake setups to fail is seized moving parts, that weren't properly greased.
Post up pics if you get stuck.
EDIT: Just re-read your second post... You have 4 bolts on the back side of your caliper. Two hold the caliper to the mounting bracket, and two more hold the bracket to the spindle or axle. The two you want to be removing are the smaller of the pairs, that hold the caliper to the bracket.
IF you're changing your rotors, then you'll need to remove the bracket as well.
