DO NOT touch the idle screw!

Idle on EFI motors should be left to being controlled by the IAC valve and ECM - it comes from the factory with a cap over it for a reason. Tampering with the idle screw to try to compensate for something else being wrong will just make your troubles even more difficult to resolve by adding yet another variable to the problem. Only time you should feel a need to fiddle with that is if you have a hardcore aftermarket cam and need to raise the idle to keep your vacuum at an acceptable level.
As far as coolant and oil mixing, you're likely confusing symptoms of a head gasket with an intake gasket. Coolant does pass through the intake manifold, as well as air, but not oil; cylinder heads have both oil AND coolant passages, thus when a head gasket blows, it can get oil in the water, or water in the oil, and/or coolant in the combustion chamber.
If you have an intake manifold leak, it's possible to have a leak where you could be sucking air (thus a vacuum leak) and/or sucking coolant into the intake and then on down into the heads and combustion chambers. Also, it's possible to have a manifold leak where it's dribbling onto the valley of the motor (under the intake, on top of the block), and it could just be evaporating before having a chance to drool on the ground. But if it was leaking badly enough to cause the problems you've described, there would probably be enough coolant coming out that you'd be seeing it dripping down somewhere.
Another possibility would be a cracked intake manifold. If something got tightened down a bit too hard and/or in the wrong sequence, you might have a crack somewhere sucking air and/or coolant. Most likely it's just sucking air, if it's not blowing white smoke now and you're sure that it's not losing coolant.
Again, before you go that far, though, check and double-check all of your vacuum lines and connections. Rubber vacuum hose is cheap - replace anything that isn't new and/or looks even remotely suspect. Then, if you really don't want to tear off the intake again and/or don't see any signs of cracking (I don't blame ya', it's a PITA), then maybe consider swapping out the MAP sensor - see if someone's got one you could borrow for testing purposes, or if you can afford one, buy a new one and (if it doesn't fix it) just keep the old one on hand as a backup spare.